Radio head

Yes it is true I do have a good head for radio.  For those of you who are a little confused as to what this actually means, it means that I am awfully ugly and look like a huge flying toad. A toad because of my nose and flying because my ear lobes are growing faster than anything else on my body, so I look sort like Dumbo.  There is also a hump growing out of the back of my neck. I have a  huge spare tyre and an enormous beer belly, except I don't drink beer.  I guess you are getting the picture.  Thus folks I am perfect for radio.  On TV I could be used to frighten little children or scare people in to auditioning for the Biggest Loser.  Don't even bother to try to re-assure me, "Oh you look fine, don't be down on yourself."  I am not down on myself, I am a realist.  If I had a choice between changing my face and body or staying the same, the answer would of course be that I want to look like Judi Dench.  No, the radio is the place for me and I embrace its anonymity.