Da Da Da Dum

When I was little I thought that when the radio was on I was the only one that could hear it and I felt a bit mean that no-one else could listen.  I also thought that dogs were boys and cats were girls.  Of course horses were boys and cows were girls.  As you can see my construct of biology was a little at odds with the real world.  Now this is cute when you are under five but when you get to be in your twenties and thirties the same cannot be said.

The first cat that we had when I was married was a girl and she got really sick so we took her to the vet.  I described the symptoms to the vet and he gave me such an old fashioned look.  You see the cat had hurt her back so she was in pain and yowling plus her tail was sort of over to one side and she couldn't walk properly.  You guessed it, she was on heat.  I didn't know.  My first cat had been de-sexed long before this happened to her so I of course had no idea what was going on.  Now you see the da da da dum.

One of my best dum dums was when I bought an air stone for the aquarium that didn't work.  I took it back to complain and the man asked me if I had attached it to an air hose.  Oooooookkkk.  I just thought you put it in with the fish and it bubbled.  OMG how embarrassing is that?  The best is yet to come.

Now I have aged a little I am capable of much more embarrassing behaviour.  I have tried to get money out of the ATM using my drivers licence.  This in itself is bad enough but worse if someone is watching.  To be vague is fine if someone does not witness that vaguery.  I have also found that panicking and trying to go out through the supermarket gates only serves to give them a nervous breakdown and not to work for anyone else trying to enter.  The worst and last thing to reveal is that the other week when I was preparing to go to the toilet I went and sat on the lounge chair with my knickers down.  I have never leapt up from a chair as quickly as I did that day.

Surely by now the da da da dum is going to wear off and I will just be a little vague.  Just enough to be cute for an older lady but not so confused that I go out to the letter box with nothing on.  I hasten to say that that has not happened yet.  So I would rather think I am not so dum but definitely ditzy.  I am fine with ditzy.